Vince, the Shamwow guy, gets real with paper towels in this parody from Funny Or Die!

Principal Eugene Mirman delivers the commencement address for his high school and includes such pearls of wisdom as “don’t be afraid to follow your dreams unless your dreams are stupid,” and “don’t become addicted to heroin, unless you want to become a great songwriter.” Found at College Humor.

Kids beware: There are deadly consequences to mixing pop and poprocks on the playground. Found at Atom.

Children, do not try this at home! This instructive video demonstrates how to make frozen fishes and turtles out of mercury. Found at Boing Boing, of course.