I just saw this clip on the NFL Network and I absolutely love it. This is Walt Garrison reciting the poem People Are Funny Critters by Baxter Black. My favorite lines:

And double scotch drinkers,
And soda straw manglers,
And bar napkin stranglers

Never thought of it, but some people do strangle bar napkins. Nice detail. Garrison was a charismatic fullback for the Dallas Cowboys back in the 70s. He was an actual cowboy who did some rodeo shows during the offseason. He messed up his knee while wrestling steer, and that injury ended his football career. Garrison was a prominent spokesman for Skoal chewing tobacco: